I'm counting the days as best as I can, but it's hard to most days. I miss you, but I want you to know that I am okay. I think a lot about all the stories you told me before and that makes me feel better!
Oh... speaking of days: happy birthday! I bet you are so much taller now!! When I see you again, I'll give you a very, very big hug! I promise you that I'm being good, so you don't have to worry about me.
I'm also being brave, so you have to be brave too.
I love you.
Yonah
PS. Tell Weissy that I say hello!
Edited 2021-06-06 19:45 (UTC)
first of all, how dare you, on a man's birthday, do this to him
[ darkness — pitch darkness. a darkness as black as ink, swallowing every inch of life in its mass like a slow tide. nier doesn't dream often; he never has. too many restless nights. too much to think about, even if each and every throught would manage to slip through the crevices of his mind and half heartedly slink back into the void. dreams were pointless. taunting. torment. they carried fear and they carried want, the two greatest vices he had ever known.
there's a letter. it's written on aged parchment; you can practically make out the tea stains rippling through the sheet. his hands begin to materialize out of the darkness. the letter slides in, gently, as if it were a parting gift.
the first two words are enough to make his eyes water inexplicably. the feeling is no different from bile rising up your throat — from anticipation, need, heartbreak. like having a patch of skin torn off the breadth of your chest only to have it slapped back on. it's raw and cutting and he holds his breath as his vision blurs with each and every word.
this isn't real, he tells himself. it can't be real. telling becomes pleading. angry pleading. a sick joke that's been played on him by a devestated mind. or perhaps the gods themselves. but whatever cry he can muster out falls on deaf ears. nier turns the page over onto its back, and a thin quill manifests in between his fingers. he is forged from stone, brutally silent, immobilized in this dream. ]
Yonah,
I'm going to get you back I promise
Please wait for me
I'm sorry I couldn't protect you
I'm sorry I didn't write back
I know it's my fault
But I'm afraid that
[ ... ]
Yonah,
I miss you more with every day that passes.
I've never been much good at writing letters. I'm sorry for that. But I see these shops and people and places and I want to tell you all about them. I want to show you them. There's so much you haven't seen yet. When you're back home with me, we can travel together once your body's stronger. So wait until then, okay?
I'm okay. You don't need to worry about me. A lot of the village is depending on me now. Weiss says it's a sign of how much I've grown but I'm not sure about that.
I'm not that tall. Or at least I don't think I am. We'll see what you think soon.
Stay safe. Wait for me. Are you alright? I'll be there soon. I promise. I'm working everyday to see you again.
It's my birthday so somebody has to grant my wish, don't they?
[yonah does not expect her letter to be answered; it's true that nier doesn't write as much as she does, but over the years she's come to ponder upon it and realize that—hey—there exactly isn't a lot of time when traveling between towns to stop and write letters, especially if he's busy and working hard, fighting shades or otherwise.
she's been sleeping a lot lately.
her body grows but it's not her own anymore. there is someone else with her, here, and though yonah cannot understand her much, she tries to be comforting.
the only comfort yonah really wants, really knows of, is to be with her brother again. the tears never stop, and so she cries and cries, while the world around her continues to be different in ways she doesn't understand. but past the comforting voice that comes now and again to try and soothe her, it's her own belief that her brother will come for her that lets her rest from her tears.
in those moments, she imagines the letters he replies with—it brings her comfort in ways that cannot be explained, to envision something that may, or may not, be real. though it's dark around her, she feels the texture of paper and can feel the bumps of the letters on her fingers, and it all but makes her smile even if the tears won't stop.
no, don't cry. i told him i'm being brave.]
Dearest brother,
[so yonah starts again, writing unto paper that she cannot see even with her eyes open, this kind of darkness one that her eyes will never get used to.]
Popola gave me a story about a tree one time. That tree had to wait and wait and wait... so, I know. I know you will come for me, so I can wait, too. I know you'll be here soon.
Even if I never get strong enough to travel with you, so long as I can be with you, at home, I [—she stops, puts a hand to her chest and curls her fingers into a fist, into her dress; she misses him so much and he's trying so hard, she knows, so yonah doesn't want him to worry more than he already does.] will be happy.
Where I am, I hear music. It's not like Devola's singing. It's more... more. Like many instruments and sometimes voices. It's very pretty. It makes me feel like a princess in a castle. I wonder if that's where I am?
I'm sorry I cannot help you find where I am. It's very dark here all the time.
Did you eat something nice for your birthday? You can make a wish before blowing out the candles...! That's what I read in a book before!
I'll keep wishing to see you again soon, so the Keeper of Wishes will have the same wish to grant over and over!!
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
—in a whisper, in a song, in a dream
I'm counting the days as best as I can, but it's hard to most days. I miss you, but I want you to know that I am okay. I think a lot about all the stories you told me before and that makes me feel better!
Oh... speaking of days: happy birthday! I bet you are so much taller now!! When I see you again, I'll give you a very, very big hug! I promise you that I'm being good, so you don't have to worry about me.
I'm also being brave, so you have to be brave too.
I love you.
Yonah
PS. Tell Weissy that I say hello!
first of all, how dare you, on a man's birthday, do this to him
there's a letter. it's written on aged parchment; you can practically make out the tea stains rippling through the sheet. his hands begin to materialize out of the darkness. the letter slides in, gently, as if it were a parting gift.
the first two words are enough to make his eyes water inexplicably. the feeling is no different from bile rising up your throat — from anticipation, need, heartbreak. like having a patch of skin torn off the breadth of your chest only to have it slapped back on. it's raw and cutting and he holds his breath as his vision blurs with each and every word.
this isn't real, he tells himself. it can't be real. telling becomes pleading. angry pleading. a sick joke that's been played on him by a devestated mind. or perhaps the gods themselves. but whatever cry he can muster out falls on deaf ears. nier turns the page over onto its back, and a thin quill manifests in between his fingers. he is forged from stone, brutally silent, immobilized in this dream. ]
Yonah,
I'm going to get you back I promise
Please wait for me
I'm sorry I couldn't protect you
I'm sorry I didn't write back
I know it's my fault
But I'm afraid that[ ... ]
Yonah,
I miss you more with every day that passes.
I've never been much good at writing letters. I'm sorry for that. But I see these shops and people and places and I want to tell you all about them. I want to show you them. There's so much you haven't seen yet. When you're back home with me, we can travel together once your body's stronger. So wait until then, okay?
I'm okay. You don't need to worry about me. A lot of the village is depending on me now. Weiss says it's a sign of how much I've grown but I'm not sure about that.
I'm not that tall. Or at least I don't think I am. We'll see what you think soon.
Stay safe. Wait for me. Are you alright? I'll be there soon. I promise. I'm working everyday to see you again.
It's my birthday so somebody has to grant my wish, don't they?
Your big brother,
Nier
someone had to do it ✨
she's been sleeping a lot lately.
her body grows but it's not her own anymore. there is someone else with her, here, and though yonah cannot understand her much, she tries to be comforting.
the only comfort yonah really wants, really knows of, is to be with her brother again. the tears never stop, and so she cries and cries, while the world around her continues to be different in ways she doesn't understand. but past the comforting voice that comes now and again to try and soothe her, it's her own belief that her brother will come for her that lets her rest from her tears.
in those moments, she imagines the letters he replies with—it brings her comfort in ways that cannot be explained, to envision something that may, or may not, be real. though it's dark around her, she feels the texture of paper and can feel the bumps of the letters on her fingers, and it all but makes her smile even if the tears won't stop.
no, don't cry. i told him i'm being brave.]
Dearest brother,
[so yonah starts again, writing unto paper that she cannot see even with her eyes open, this kind of darkness one that her eyes will never get used to.]
Popola gave me a story about a tree one time. That tree had to wait and wait and wait... so, I know. I know you will come for me, so I can wait, too. I know you'll be here soon.
Even if I never get strong enough to travel with you, so long as I can be with you, at home, I [—she stops, puts a hand to her chest and curls her fingers into a fist, into her dress; she misses him so much and he's trying so hard, she knows, so yonah doesn't want him to worry more than he already does.] will be happy.
Where I am, I hear music. It's not like Devola's singing. It's more... more. Like many instruments and sometimes voices. It's very pretty. It makes me feel like a princess in a castle. I wonder if that's where I am?
I'm sorry I cannot help you find where I am. It's very dark here all the time.
Did you eat something nice for your birthday? You can make a wish before blowing out the candles...! That's what I read in a book before!
I'll keep wishing to see you again soon, so the Keeper of Wishes will have the same wish to grant over and over!!
I love you, always.
Yonah